Cliff jumping in Thailand: when is the right time to be a pussy?

I’m afraid of heights and I’m not shy about it. During my round the world trip I had to deal with my fear a couple of times. I usually had two options: i) face my fear and go for it; or ii) give up, run away and be nicknamed pussy by my friends. I usually choose option one, but sometimes, I later found out, it is better to trust your fear and just give up. This time was in Thailand.

If there’s a paradise on earth, Ko Phi Phi, Thailand, must be it. An amazing island in the middle of the pacific where backpackers from all over the world meet, party and, very often, try dangerous stuff. I got there with two of my Brazilian friends and we were particularly (not me, really) excited with one of the many tourist attractions that were being sold by the locals: the 20 meters cliff jump.

Going with one of the many local tourist agencies seemed pretty damn expensive, so we improvised. We asked for one of the boat drivers at the shore how much he would charge us to go there. It wasn’t much, so we made a deal. We would go the next morning.

Heading to the cliff, my friends started to display some kind of discontent or fear about what we were about to do. But this time, I don’t know why, I wasn’t feeling that afraid, maybe I’ve changed.

The boat was very slow, I could swim faster than that, but we got there anyway. The cliff seemed high and nobody was there at the time. Weird.

We climbed the rocks with a good degree of difficulty and we got to the top. My friends were shaking and we started to discuss who would go first. “Not me” “If you jump, I promise I’ll go after you!” we said to each other. We decided to double check with the boat driver “is it safe to jump?” I said; “it is up to you!” he replied. What the hell was this guy talking about? This cliff is famous and everybody comes here, it must be safe. “Is it deep enough?” I tried again; “just jump!” he answered.

I looked down, to the beatiful dark blue sea and I felt this was my time to be brave. I threw my havaianas and I saw it take about 4 seconds to reach the surface. Damn! It was high. As the place was very rocky and I was afraid of hiting my head I jumped the furthest I could. This ended up not being a very good Idea, as I lost my balance during the flight and hit with my back on the surface. It felt like concrete.

My friends shouted “good boy! How was it?!”; “don’t jump! Take me to the hospital!” I replied. My back was hurting a lot and I could barely swim. The boat driver was pretty insensitive and denied me his help, so I had to swim 10 meters to reach the boat. My friends went down and jumped from the 6 meters cliff, the place for the pussies. But this time they were right.

We all went to a local hospital, which lacked the proper equipment to analyse my back (x-ray, for example). A muslim lady touched my spine with her hands and diagnosed “its just muscle pain, you didn’t break anything”. She called a tuk-tuk (a motorcicle with a cabin) and we drove back to my hostel on a rocky road, where each bounce felt like a stab in my back.

I had to take pills and my friends had to help me with my backpack (there’s always a positive side) each time we changed cities, for about 2 weeks. After this day, I will always try to be rational each time I face my fears.

Sometimes its just better to be a pussy and keep going with your life.

Picture: Ko Phi Phi's famous cliff